Even Nigel Farage looked taken aback by the news Honest Bob was about to join his flock, but he quickly saw the upside

• UK politics live – latest updates

One is too many and 1,000 never enough. Addiction is a tricky business. What starts as fun inevitably, insidiously, tears away the soul. And there are signs that Nigel Farage’s press conference habit is getting out of control. He started off at one a week. Then his narcissistic need craved more and more attention. So he upped it to two or three a week. Each time the buzz got less. He was mainlining more and more just to try to stand still. To keep the withdrawals at bay. Still not enough. So on Thursday, Nige upped the dose to two inside a day. This can only end in a spell in rehab. Followed by meetings of PA. Pressers Anonymous.

Boom. The best laid plans etc. Nige was just six minutes into his first press conference of the day – the unveiling of the latest Tory defector, the meg-rich Malcolm Offord, whose lifetime achievements amount to buying yachts, as the leader of Reform Scotland – when it all kicked off. Malc had just signed a card renouncing his peerage, when every journalist in the room started looking at their phones. There was breaking news. Kemi Badenoch had announced she was sacking Robert Jenrick from the shadow cabinet and the Tory party.

Even Nigel Farage looked taken aback by the news Honest Bob was about to join his flock, but he quickly saw the upside

• UK politics live – latest updates

One is too many and 1,000 never enough. Addiction is a tricky business. What starts as fun inevitably, insidiously, tears away the soul. And there are signs that Nigel Farage’s press conference habit is getting out of control. He started off at one a week. Then his narcissistic need craved more and more attention. So he upped it to two or three a week. Each time the buzz got less. He was mainlining more and more just to try to stand still. To keep the withdrawals at bay. Still not enough. So on Thursday, Nige upped the dose to two inside a day. This can only end in a spell in rehab. Followed by meetings of PA. Pressers Anonymous.

Boom. The best laid plans etc. Nige was just six minutes into his first press conference of the day – the unveiling of the latest Tory defector, the meg-rich Malcolm Offord, whose lifetime achievements amount to buying yachts, as the leader of Reform Scotland – when it all kicked off. Malc had just signed a card renouncing his peerage, when every journalist in the room started looking at their phones. There was breaking news. Kemi Badenoch had announced she was sacking Robert Jenrick from the shadow cabinet and the Tory party.

Even Nigel Farage looked taken aback by the news Honest Bob was about to join his flock, but he quickly saw the upside

• UK politics live – latest updates

One is too many and 1,000 never enough. Addiction is a tricky business. What starts as fun inevitably, insidiously, tears away the soul. And there are signs that Nigel Farage’s press conference habit is getting out of control. He started off at one a week. Then his narcissistic need craved more and more attention. So he upped it to two or three a week. Each time the buzz got less. He was mainlining more and more just to try to stand still. To keep the withdrawals at bay. Still not enough. So on Thursday, Nige upped the dose to two inside a day. This can only end in a spell in rehab. Followed by meetings of PA. Pressers Anonymous.

Boom. The best laid plans etc. Nige was just six minutes into his first press conference of the day – the unveiling of the latest Tory defector, the meg-rich Malcolm Offord, whose lifetime achievements amount to buying yachts, as the leader of Reform Scotland – when it all kicked off. Malc had just signed a card renouncing his peerage, when every journalist in the room started looking at their phones. There was breaking news. Kemi Badenoch had announced she was sacking Robert Jenrick from the shadow cabinet and the Tory party.