Guardian advice columnist Annalisa Barbieri on strengthening bonds with the people who matter to us

We’ve all left a social occasion with someone feeling buoyed, or utterly deflated and angry. You can either blame yourself or the other person, but it’s often a combination of the two - or something you each bring out in the other. You can only take responsibility for your own behaviour, so look at your own responses; are you snippy? Do you answer back? Should you? It’s not that you shouldn’t retaliate, but you do need to see your place in things. If a relationship makes you feel better about yourself, cherish it and do the same for them. If not, think about why you’re still there.